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Zach Galifianakis Quotes


Zach Galianakis
  • Mini Bio
  • Name: Zachary Knight Galifianakis
  • Born: 1st October 1969, Wilkesboro, North Carolina, U.S.
  • Occupation: Actor, writer and comedian
  • Height: 5' 7" (1.7 m)
  • Genre: Alternative comedy
  • Best known for: The Hangover trilogy
  • Residence: He owns a 60 acre farm in North Carolina he calls Farmageddon
  • Trivia: Zach is claustrophobic and afraid of heights. He once pulled out of a Brazilian press conference for the movie Hangover 3 when he found out the only way up to Morro da Urca in Rio de Janeiro was by cable car.
  • Scroll down for full bio and many great quotes

"You know you have a drinking problem when the bartender knows your name -- and you've never been to that bar before"

Zach Galifianakis

"I tend to think of myself as a one-man wolf pack"

Zach Galifianakis

"I think there’s a gravitational pull in the entertainment business toward people who are messed up already, and the business makes them even worse"

Zach Galifianakis

"I have a lot of growing up to do. I realized that the other day inside my fort"

Zach Galifianakis

"I dream of moving to India, or Pakistan, and becoming a cabdriver"

Zach Galifianakis

"I'm not even much of a partier. I mean, I'll drink myself into oblivion alone in my car"

Zach Galifianakis

"A good stand-up, you lead the audience. You don't kowtow to the audience..... I always think the audience is wrong"

Zach Galifianakis

"I think we’re all a bit off-kilter in our own way. Everybody has got an issue, whether they want to admit it or not"

Zach Galifianakis

"My farm is a place that I get to think clearly and pretend to know what I am doing"

Zach Galifianakis

"I think those neighborhood signs that say 'slow children playing' are so very mean"

Zach Galifianakis

"My girlfriend looks a little like Charlize Theron...and a lot like Patrick Ewing"

Zach Galifianakis

"Hello, my name is Zach Galifianakis, and I hope I'm pronouncing that right"

Zach Galifianakis

"At what age do you think it's appropriate to tell a highway it's adopted?"

Zach Galifianakis

"I dream of starting a three-man country trio called the Chixie Dicks"

Zach Galifianakis

"It is a portfolio. Indiana Jones wears one"

Zach Galifianakis

"Tigers love pepper, they hate cinnamon"

Zach Galifianakis

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Zach Galifianakis Biography

Zach Galifianakis is the epitome of stand up black comedy enthusiastically delivering his deadpan self-deprecating dialogue with aplomb that takes you to the edge of surreal nervousness where you sit uncomfortably yet laughing hysterically at the same time.



This was the insane line of comedy he walked for many years before his 2009 blockbuster hit "The Hangover" which elevated him to the A list of comedy icons.

Behind the beard is a man of quick wits and intelligence who just happens to contemplate some of lifes more awkward moments in his acting persona.

It is Zach's unpredictability that keeps you on the edge of your seat, you never know what will come next from him and with those staring eyes he can easily slip into the most insane roles that Hollywood has to offer.

With a caustic tongue and a sense of Machiavellian humour it is difficult to discern whether he is being serious or still in character so it made interesting research compiling my list of 16 of the best Zach Galifianakis quotes.

Quotes About Zach Galifianakis

The journalist Mike Peters described him thus: "Despite an imbalance in his acting résumé, there is one area in which he continues to excel: stand-up comedy. His style is unorthodox - incorporating a piano and occasionally other musical elements, often straying from his scripted jokes and interacting with audience members"

The critic Ben Kharakh was impressed to say: "Zach Galifianakis is probably one of the most unique comedians in the circuit today"

The producer Scott Aukerman on the build up to the "Between Two Ferns" project: "I just knew I wanted to work with Zach on something. So we had money and I just said, Hey, whatever you want to do, let's do"


Zach Galifianakis image quote